…that I’d be changed forever.

The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new.

I was sorting out old photos of myself when I was still single and although I look more or less the same with long hair and darker skin tone I feel like a totally different person.

The day after I had Joshua, the fact that I was already a mom has not really sunk in yet. It was like there’s me Van & there’s someone else - a mom; except that’s still me. Confusing?

After some time those two entities merged & it became a different person. Mommy Van. Nobody prepared me for that mind altering fact. I’ve become a new person. A new outlook in life, a different mind-set and set new priorities. It feels as if my heart is outside of my body and every move my baby makes is a milestone. When I decide, I always think of the baby’s welfare first before my own.

Any mother would agree.

******************

Now, everybody is telling me to STOP breastfeeding my 23-month old son. I want to really, but he kisses me & says a-poo (love you) when he wants to be nursed. Tell me, can you say no to that?

Right after lunch, my sister Jennie, Josh & I were in the room playing with Ozzy. The little boy was rummaging through my bag and kept on saying “ic ac”. I knew he wanted tictacs. He has always loved tictacs especially the orange one which is minty yet sweet. It is always nearby because I can bribe him with that.

So anyway… Jennie suddenly remembers a test for kids.

She gave 1 tictac to Ozzy, looked him in the eye and calmly explained to him that if he keeps an eye on the treat for 1 minute she’ll give him 1 more. She placed the tictac on the table and the three of us proceeded to chat. We did not bother Ozzy or talk to him; but we were quietly observing him. I can see that he wanted to grab the little treat but he kept on hesitating then would glance at us occasionally.

Surprisingly, 1 minute passed by and he was still there. Glued to where we left him eyes fixed on the treat.

As his reward, his Aunty Jennie gave him 2 tictacs. He was so happy. Holding his 2 treats. Honestly, I didn’t think he’d pass that test. Knowing my son he is impatient like me, but he understood the concept of waiting to get a reward.

Amazing.

Thanks for this tag Wena.

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Rules :
1. Start Copy from “Begin Copy” until “End Copy”.
2. Choose the photo(s) of you and your child(ren) that you would like to share in your blog, with a small story/explanation about when and where the photo(s) was/were taken.
3. Add your blog name and url blog, then leave your url post in here. And I’ll add you to the Master List.
4. Please help spread this tag by tagging your friends as much as you can.

5. Please come back again to copy the update of the master list, often. This process will help new participants to get the same gains as the first participants.

Master List : 1. Juliana’s Site 2. Moms…..check nyo 3. Pinay WAHM 4. Residual Matters 5. So Cute 6. Pinaymama’s Diary 7. Beauty of Life 8. Point of View 9. The Callalily Space 10. Nyumix 11. Aeirin Collections 12. 3 Garnets & 2 Sapphires 13. Twerlermz’s Blog 14. My Virtual Journal 15. Capturing The Moments 16. Jenny and Belle 17. Just another day in sunny Florida 18. Pampered 19. Apple of my Eyes 20. Mummy Diaries 21. All about your child 22. Super Mae 23. It’s my party 24. In My home 25. LZMommy 26. All Natural 27. It’s a woman’s world 28. Rantings of A Woman 29. ParentZine 30. Me and Mine 31. FunFierceFabulous 32. Dancing in Midlife Tune 33. My Colorful World 34.YOU (updated 6/27/2008)

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This picture was taken when we visited Ozzy’s paternal grandparents in Siquijor. I chose this picture because it is - by far - my favorite picture of me & my baby. The beach, the sunset & us. It looks so peaceful. It looks so perfect, just like how I feel every time I look at my son. I could not ask for more.

Tagging { Abie, Alpha, Em, Hailey, Meeya, Ris & Thea {berryscappy} }

I slept at 4AM today. Why? Because Ozzy slept at 4AM. I don’t know what happened. I don’t know if its something he ate or drank. He was still actively playing at 4AM. Yep, 4-freakin’-the-rooster-is-about-to-crow AM. My eyelids were happy for 2 hours when he slept till 6:00 then was unhappy again as the boy was asking for milk. Good thing he slept until 8:00AM. At least…..

Anywhoo…Usually he is asleep by 9:00PM and wake up at 6:00AM.

We watched 2 episodes of CSI and nothing. I danced. I sang. I pleaded with him. I scolded him. Gave him hot milk. I played with him. He even counted for me 1-10! But still, nothing. He was wide awake while me & J was red-eyed and ready to fall asleep anytime.

What happened there little one did you secretly smuggle Cafe Latte’s from Starbucks?! Seriously, 4AM?!

Mommy Eds asked me,” What age is perfect for kids to enter school?” I already read about this in Nice’s site. And I was really thinking about this question seriously, that’s why it took me time to answer. (as you know I hate thinking)

Question:

For those who have kids who are not yet schooling, what age will you enter your child to school? Why did you pick that age?

My Answer:

Right now, my little boy is 23 months old. I haven’t even started to prepare for his 2nd birthday preparation let alone think about him entering preschool! In my mind, he is still TOO young. I will THINK about it when he is 2 1/2 years old already.

Funny that I was asked this now when earlier I received a call from Bright Academy. Ozzy was invited to come visit and check out their facilities. They offer a playgroup for kids from 1 1/2- 2 1/2.

We’ll see.

I don’t want to start him too early & he’ll end up hating school by the time he reaches Grade 5! Or am I being too paranoid here? Maybe a playgroup will improve his social skills..Hmmm.

Last week started dreadful. Ozzy got sick, high fever + rashes. Fortunately for him it was not measles and now he’s perfectly fine. BUT those 3 days were so tiring for me. Little boy was extra clingy and would not eat. He lost 1.5kgs in 3 days.

The end of the week proved to be better for us. Josh finally got the documents he was waiting for from Norway to be submitted to the Consul for his VISA Application. Now, all we have to do is wait. Wait for his application to be approved..or (gasp!) denied.

*TODAY 6/20/2008* is officially his 1st day without work. So, we are +hoping+ his VISA will be approved. Please keep you fingers crossed people.

Updates on the little boy:

• He can now say his full first name “josh (pause) wah” (Joshua) & not just Ow-wah.
• Prefers ice cubes ti ice cream.
• He bites his nails. (ask!) I cut it short but he keeps on trying! I notice he bites it when he is bored.
• His bath time is crazy, sometimes he loves it sometimes I have difficulty in persuading him to take a bath!! Weird.
• He naps once a day instead of twice, sometimes in the morning, sometimes in the afternoon. (gotta establish a new schedule for this, I think it’s better he sleep in the afternoons,right?)
• Loves to imitate what we are saying. When we watch Wheel of Fortune he shouts the letters whenever contestants say them.

Generally, his vocabulary is fast expanding & getting better. We can easily understand what he wants & what he doesn’t want. At least with this we can lessen his tantrums because he is understood. Although…he is a bit stubborn and would insist on his way thus resulting to a few “crying” and a bit of shouting.

That’s it for last weeks highlights. I seem to have lost mojo in blogging..I think it’s because I don’t have tasks. Teehee. Hoping for more tasks next week.

I read in Milet’s blog that she prefers calling the stage “Talented Two” for terrible just sounds wrong. I agree if we keep on calling our child terrible or bad he will grow up living up to THAT name. So let’s not start them off with the wrong notion.

When my 23 month old son acts up, I always reprimand him with a calm but firm voice. When this fails I resort to glaring and high-pitched shrills. When THIS fails, I let him be. He would lie on the floor crying his lungs out calling out my name. Then after he’d realize I won’t pick him up then he’d come crawling to me.

These things worries me though; can I still call him ‘talented’ when he’s being ‘terrible’?

• shouting at the top of his lungs when we do not give him his wants Read more… »

  

Oohhh did you notice? It’s Friday the 13th. I read in Jammy’s Blog that in some counties today is considered to be unlucky. I, for one is not superstitious whatsoever. Luck better be at our side. Hmpf.

See, Josh received the documents he was waiting for from Norway yesterday & today he will be applying for his VISA, so luck better be at his side today.

Ozzy on the other hand is lucky since his fever has not returned anymore. BUT rashes are sprouting all over his little body. I think its Rubella commonly called German Measles. We are going to the doctor by 10am. Luck better be at Ozzy’s side as well, I don’t want him to suffer any more. He keeps on saying “mommy yayay”. Poor baby.

Also, lucky for me I found Leptovox for my sister who is trying to lose weight. Friday the 13th unlucky? Maybe not.

Being a mom is not almost always fun. I have mentioned in my blogs numerous times reasons why I love being a mom; but honestly to be blunt about it there are some things I really dislike (hate is such a strong word) about it.

I don’t like…..

1. ……….the fact that I don’t get to sleep for 8 hours straight.
2. ……….feeling guilty every time I am away. ME-time sometimes isn’t fun when you’re mind is not there.
3. ……….having to clean poop.
4. ……….how Ozzy decides to poop seconds after I changed him into a clean nappy.
5. ……….HAVING stretch marks. Goodbye stretch-mark free tummy…for this reason alone; I ask God why MEN are not the once experiencing child birth?! teehee
6. ……….that whenever we are in a restaurant I cannot eat properly. (I almost always never bring yaya around; I want to be hands on as much as possible)
7. ……….being bitten & sometimes hit. (uh-huh he hits now..tsktsk, kainis!)
8. ……….when people assume I know everything just because I am a mom; I am human I make mistakes too. Spare me the, “Dapat alam mo na yon” speech. I am a first-timer, give me a break.
9. ……….scolding my 2 year old boy every time he picks up something on the floor & puts it in his mouth.
10. ……….Or scolding in general. Or loosing my patience. Or having to glare at the boy for being noisy in church. Or when he bites his nails. It’s not that I ‘hate‘ it but I just don’t enjoy being a disciplinarian. I want to be the spoiler. But I know that would not be a good thing in the long run.

Now you may think I am bad or what it doesn’t matter; this post doesn’t mean I love my son less or I am a terrible mother (although at times I feel I am inadequate), I am merely pointing out things that make parenting hard. It’s a tough job but someone has to do it right?

Having a kid is a continuous roller coaster ride. Any parent knows this. Some dread it that’s why they steer clear of the parent train. Such a shame really for you won’t be able to experience utter embarrassment if not.

At the doctor’s office yesterday.

Dr. G : Van, how is Ozzy’s bowel movement?

Me : Its fine doc, no problem there, he poops regularly except he hasn’t pooped yet today.

Dr. G : That’s fine, ok.

+ The whole time Ozzy was sitting on my lap; he squirmed his way down and began to squat on the floor turned red in the face and exclaimed,”Mommy!! uu! (mommy poopoo).” +

Me : uhmmm baby what are you doing?

Ozzy : uu. (with matching funny face + index finger covering his nose)

+We were all laughing now, including Dr.G+

Me : So sorry for that doc.

+ By now the smell was dreadful+

Dr.G : That’s quite alright.

+ We quickly finished up the appointment & fled as fast as we could +